How To Be A Good Father – Be Engaged

Recently I found myself face to face with the question 'How To Be A Good Father', all because of some girls fascinated with flamenco.

Urmila and I had dinner at ‘El Gaucho’ on Mojacar Playa. It’s a fabulous Argentinian steak house that has live Flamenco on a Friday night. It’s normally full but during August – Spanish holiday month – it’s chaos.

There were at least a dozen 8-10 year old girls in flamenco costumes, with their families. Seeing them all dancing on stage together was not what I went out for!

My eye was caught, however, by the British family at the table next to us. There were the mother and father and three young girls in the 8-10 year age range. What caught my eye was the behaviour, or lack of it, of the father.

He was just not engaged with his daughters, he seemed to leave it all to his wife, that was a mother’s task.

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Emotional Abuse – I Still Want To Kick The Shit Out Of Him…

Being dominating and using mental and emotional abuse is as bad as being physically abusive.

I was in Glasgow with my parents on our annual trip back to Scotland to visit family. I must have been in my early teens. I went off for the day to explore the city on my own. I’ve always enjoyed walking around new and strange cities. My love of steam trains (they still existed then) took me to St Enoch Station.

Standing on the steps looking at my map and wondering where to go next, I was approached by a man seeking to help me.

I was the typical innocent abroad and trusted this man. We started talking and he offered to buy me a coffee in the station cafe. I accepted.

We sat in a quiet corner and at one point he gently took my hand and laid it on his leg. I realised my hand was on his erect penis. I was horrified and only then realised why this man was so helpful. I got away as quick as I could.

Although nothing serious happened to me this experience has remained with me for 50 years now.

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I Am Male, and I Am a Man

The first is biological and undeniable; the second is in my character.

To understand myself as a man, I need to look at my behaviour.

In my early 50s, I was the Design Principal of a practice based in London. There were eight of us—four men and four women. The firm was owned and run by men, including me, but the main design leaders were women.

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The Brave Put Down Their Fear And Go Forward

What are you most fearful of? Do you have a fear of success?

What is the worst thing that could happen to you? What is it that you secretly dread more than anything else? Do you have a fear of success or failure?

For most people there are two fears that have greater power than any other. They are the fear that they aren’t loved or the fear that they aren’t good enough.

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Bushido Code – The Samurai For Todays Men

bushido code

The Warriors Way was the code the Samurai Warriors lived by.

The Warrior’s Way of strength and rigour amazes and frightens others at the same time. Men feel a desire to follow Bushido Code but the western world seems to work against it. The context, particularly of today’s world, does not seem to allow for its existence.

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He Is A Rogue — He Has The Best Male Blog

I am a man and I am a blogger. In fact I’ve turned it back on itsel—I blog about men!

Now, some men are rogues. We all know rogues: they are focused, calculating, dedicated, and only want one thing. These are the qualities of a real rogue—and the qualities of a successful blogger.

Look at what Chris Guillebeau, at Art of Non-Conformity, said:

The reality that I need to work more than I thought has required some sacrifices I did not expect in the beginning, and it took me a while to become comfortable with this.

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The Courage To Change – To Feel Love – To Feel Important

courage to change

When we first met you were crazy about her. You couldn't stop talking about her. You wanted so much to be with her, all the time, but you couldn't make it work. You needed her to show you the way. But it never happened, it fell apart. What do you want now...

I wonder, “What do you want in life?” When we first met you were crazy about her. You couldn’t stop talking about her.

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How Bubbles The Stupid Dog Is Inspiring

the dog is inspiring

Bubbles is a Spanish Water Dog. Her favourite game is to chase balls that you throw for her. How is that inspiring?

She places the ball at your feet and stands waiting for you to throw it. All the time she is focused on you, gazing expectantly into your eyes. You throw the ball and she hares after it, brings it back and the whole process starts again.

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